Proposed Deadline: Sunday, April 21
This draft presents Act 1 of 'Umbral,' a graphic novel planned in three acts. It’s the foundation for our world, characters, and primary conflicts. You will have questions that will not be answered by the time you are done with this draft’s contents and that’s ok!
Focus at this stage is less on spelling, grammar, and detailed visual descriptions, and more on the narrative’s essence. These elements will be refined in the scriptwriting and visual development phases.
THANK YOU!
To express my gratitude, I plan to include a 'Thank You' page in the final versions of both the main comic 'Umbral' and the 'Research Grimoire’. This page will be a special space dedicated to acknowledging everyone who's played a role in bringing this project to life. Your feedback is really appreciated and I look forward to celebrating everyone in this special way!
For this stage, areas where your feedback is most helpful:
Story and Narrative Structure
Which parts of the story drew you in the most and why?
Which parts of the story did you start to find yourself losing interest and why?
[Bonus] Setting and World-building
Is the world-building consistent throughout Act 1?
Were there any moments where the setting felt disjointed or contradictory?
[Bonus] Other thoughts
Anything else you want to share or say!
If you are feeling inspired, I welcome any other thoughts you may have on characters, lore, and world/setting within the scope of Act 1. Your intuitive and honest feedback is important.
Under the shadow of an infinite army, protecting the Light never seemed so daunting. Terror casts long shadows, eroding the very illusion of choice and sanity, posing the question: Is the Void Eluvianna’s destiny? Chaos is inevitable: paladins twisted in darkness, mages helm secret cults—artifacts of power vibrate with intention. With fates tangled and loyalties trialed, sometimes the greatest battles are fought within.
WHERE ARE WE?
The setting is Legion Dalaran during the Shadows of Argus patch (7.3). Argus is now part of the sky, Alleria and Umbric have introduced the first Void Elves, and we will soon join the battle in Antorus. The story is as we experienced it as players but expanding on a few existing concepts such as The Netherlight Temple, The Violet Citadel, and introducing an organization partnering with the Kirin Tor, “The Council of Relics”.
Proof of Concept: Netherlight Temple & Hall Mirrors
✦ KRASSUS’S LANDING ✦
Expanded to include a portal at the in-game spawn point (bottom of the stairs) in Legion Dalaran.
✦ THE COUNCIL OF RELICS ✦
The Council of Relics’ work revolves around various projects with goals such as the study, preservation, and cataloging of artifacts—expanding on the work done by the Kirin Tor to research the titan artifacts needed to seal the Tomb of Sargeras, The Pillars of Creation.
The Council of Relics is located within a dedicated wing of The Violet Citadel and hosts its own library, a counterpart to the Kirin Tor’s own Grand Library, called the Grand Archive. This allows for cross-work to be done as well as convenient access for students, scholars, etc. who will contribute to either or both. Each college has a mentorship program that gives students an opportunity to participate in the council's projects.
✦ NETHERLIGHT ✦
The Netherlight Temple now includes an educational arm that works in tandem with its class hall, called Netherlight Hall and its dormitory, The Cloisters. At the beginning of the events of Legion, the priest Conclave decided it was time to enact a longtime idea, a formal priest university (Netherlight Hall.)
Netherlight Temple and Netherlight Hall are represented by “mirrors” — arcane energy structures/holograms that appear like buildings within Dalaran City with portals at their entrances, functioning exactly as the class hall portals do in-game, porting players to the respective class halls at their non-Broken Isles locations.
LORE QUESTIONS???
For the sake of this feedback request, I’ve shared just the essentials. There are so many more details to the above but these are what I felt were more relevant to the world in Act 1.
In working on this project, I’ve tried my best to respect the official lore and continue to do research throughout this entire process. However, I welcome any questions or comments you have! You can either include them with your feedback or in DMs.